In a shocking turn of the cultural landscape, rock band Creed has emerged from their retirement home.

The increased public interest had been generated after the group was spotted sightseeing at a Rangers game, and, when the team celebrated their World Series win by reciting, in four different keys, Creed’s hit song, Higher, they threw a match into gasoline.

And so their world tour began. Sold out arenas, merchandise (With paws wide open, a dog collar), meet-and-greets, even guitar-workshops. Everything to do with Creed amongst the divorced-dad genre listeners was gone- snatched up by the lonely men that so make up the fanbase.

But all the joy was not to last, unfortunately, despite the optimism associated with the fanatically whimsical hopes of the ticket purchasers. The prices surrounding Creed soared, and the band, without further need to create music to generate buttloads of money, created a second tour, hitting all the stops not journeyed to the first time around. There is, despite enough material of unreleased music, no plans to record, or create, or release, anything new.

And so it is, the way it was a decade prior. There was a tour, a reunion, and then a falling away. We had our hopes up then, and we had them higher now. It truly is a disappointing revelation to find that the band is yet to release new music, because that’s hard, or something…. I mean, they could be right. Just finance a massive tour, plan it, and then play guitar. Oh wait, they could do that in a studio.